NW Trek

It had been a few years since my last visit... probably more than a decade. This weekend I made a trip to NW Trek with Stephen and his niece and nephew. Seeing kids experience the world is so much fun! Stephen is a big kid himself and LOVES animals, so he was just as excited as Luke and Lily. We had a great time on the tram, having lunch in the cafe, and strolling through the park for six hours. The kids made horn crowns... well, I made them after they asked for help and left me at the craft table to finish the task. Lily almost climbed the fence to go into the bear exhibit. Yes, bears are her favorite. She kept asking for the bears all day long. My favorite part was the tram ride. There were so many animals out and they were so close too! Lucas enjoyed the cougar the most. I am not sure what Stephen's favorite part was... pretty sure he loved it all! It was wonderful and exhausting! Man, am I glad I am not a parent yet! But I can't wait til the next time when we can take the kids to another fun place... just to see them experience the world. It is a precious thing being a kid. So much yet to discover. It was a joy to be with those kids this weekend.

Stephen's 31st Birthday

Today my man celebrated his 31st year of life. I made him my famous peanut butter cake. Yep, that hooked him for life. I crumbled reese's peanut butter cups over the milk chocolate frosting for extra kick. It was a hit... as usual :) We went out with a bunch of his friends to Round Table Pizza to celebrate. Happy Birthday Stephen! I am so happy I can celebrate this special day with you! Praying for many more birthday celebrations in our future! I love you!

Six Months

My final was scheduled close to our actual anniversary day so we celebrated a day later just about an hour after my final was finished. Major celebration!
So Stephen was waiting for me in the driveway when I got home from school that day. He promptly whisked me away to Olive Garden in Federal Way for some early dinner/late lunch. It is one of both of our favourite places to go. After dinning we went to a park that had a beautiful boardwalk and bunnies everywhere! It was absolutely gorgeous... except for the rain and the fact that I was wearing flip flops and almost fell on my ass ten feet into our walk on the boardwalk :)
After sitting on a bench and watching the bunnies for awhile we went to the cheap theater and watched Alice in Wonderland. It was so cool! I actually enjoyed it more than I thought I would. The story line was different than the movie I remember as a kid and it was so creative and colorful!
After the movie we went next door to Cold Stone where we had our first date ever and had romantic ice cream while listening to the melodic sounds of the Cold Stone employees singing songs of sweetness (ice cream). It was so special. When we walked out of Cold Stone there were two beautiful rainbows side by side in the sky. I stopped and hugged Stephen with my head to his chest and he of course told me he ordered them special for our day. It was then that I realized his heart was pounding like a drum harder than I had ever heard it before. I told him and he said it was because he loves me. He then grabbed my hand and put something in my palm and told me that he wanted to make some promises to me. Promises to spend the rest of his life loving me, promises to be faithful and trust me, and promises to respect me and a bunch of other stuff I can't remember. He then opened my hand and there was a ring. He told me it was a Promise ring. He made me all of those beautiful promises. It was so special. I reminded him that rainbows are God's promises to man. It was such a beautiful day! I felt so loved and still feel so loved by Stephen. He is amazing.

Picnic in the Rain

Today Stephen and I set out to have a romantic picnic. We packed our adorable basket with bubbly drink and the required items needed to make peanut butter and honey sandwiches. Threw in some fruit and an extra protein drink for the hike. Where was this picnic to be had? At Snoqualmie Falls of course! And what kind of day was it? It was a glorious rainy spring day, of course!

Once we arrived at our destination we found the perfect picnic table. This table was located under the dripping trees and the benches were soaking wet. We sat on the table cloth that we otherwise would have used for the... table. We carefully made our sandwiches while laughing as we were getting more and more drenched by the dripping trees as we ate. Our sandwiches were soggy with rain and tree water, but we were having fun! Oh, we were in the making of a great memory! The rain stopped long enough to give us hope for our hike. Yep, we were about to hike down to the bottom of the Falls. The going down part is a whole lot easier than the going up part. At the bottom we realized we need to get into better shape so we can make it to the top without taking breaks. We huffed and puffed and made it to the top (while being passed by young and old). But we made it! Next time we take this hike, the plan is to be in better shape!

Welcome Bella!

My baby brother became a dad today. This seems so crazy and yet it is factual. Her name is Bella Grace. She is beautiful. Seeing him hold his daughter is so precious. I am so happy for him to have a little girl and a family to take care of. Congrats Nick & Shali! You are a beautiful family!

prodigal sister and the fam

so i just listened to a sermon online and it was talking about the prodigal son and that whole story... i need to share something else before i get back to the rest of what this prodigal son story was speaking to my heart about.

so...about two and a half years ago my sister and i went to europe together. before we left i had a dream that she was the prodigal son and lost everything she had. at the time i had the dream she was married to her husband of almost ten years and had four kids ages 10, 8, 5, and 18 months. the moment we arrived in europe together i found out my sister had been struggling in her marriage for quite some time. she had at least two "boy-friends" she had met online and told me she was going to get a divorce when she got home. she got home from europe and... two weeks later she moved out of state leaving her husband and four daughters. she had made a verbal agreement with her husband that in a year she would get custody of the girls. needless to say, the state had a different view of the situation and granted full custody of the girls to my now ex brother in law and considered that she chose to abandon her family giving her very limited rights to her girls. the eldest of her daughters was born of a different father but raised by the other girls' dad for those almost ten years of marriage. her eldest daughters father (and grandparents) found out she had left the state and marched over and ripped my niece away from the family she had known all of her life. so my sis has gone back and forth from the state away from her girls back to where they live a few times in the past two and a half years.
she has now been living in the same city with the three younger girls for more than six months.

my mom talks to my sister multiple times a day. my sister doesn't even call me on my birthday or if i am in the hospital anymore. she knows how i feel about the choices she has made and knows i will have a hard time believing anything she says to me because the trust is not there.

two weeks ago my sister found out that the father of the three younger girls is moving to another state and taking the girls with him and his new wife. this move is meant to sever the relationships between my sis and her girls. two days ago my sis found out that the father of her eldest daughter is taking her to court again and that the state is considering her an unfit mother and that they are most likely going to grant him full custody. my sis is broken right now. i am having a really hard time with this. i have no idea what that would feel like as a mother to have your children taken away from you... and then again she chose to leave her girls behind just two and a half years ago.

after listening to the story of the prodigal son i am struggling not only with the facts that i thought my sister had lost everything and yet it seems as if she is losing even more right now... i am also struggling with the understanding of who the brother of that prodigal son is. my mom is certainly running toward my sis with outstretched arms and preparing the fatted calf and calling for a party to get started because she believes my sis is changing. i on the other hand still am struggling with trusting what she is saying and even thinking she brought this upon herself. she chose this.

why can't i embrace her like my mom? why is it so hard to trust and even to show sympathy to my own sister? i feel as if i am the brother in this story and not able to join the party. did the father in this story have any proof of the lost sons change? had he seen it in action other than those few words of repentance? he was so excited for his son to be home that he was calling to the servants as his son was apologizing to him. why can't i give that kind of love and grace to my sister? why must i expect proof of a change in her before i can show her sympathy or try and trust again?

my sister will be in town in five days. she will be going to court to testify and try to fight for custody of her eldest daughter. i am not sure what i am supposed to do. well, i know i am called to love.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. Love will last forever (1 cor 13:4-8)

God help me. i certainly don't feel like i can embrace my sister right now. please show me how you see her. Lord give me a heart of compassion to be able to at least understand her pain. Lord help me to be able to look at her and speak to her in love without all of the pain of the past. Lord help me to not keep those records. Lord help me to be hopeful. Lord help me not to be irritated or rude. Lord give me your strength to never give up, to never lose faith, and to always hope for YOUR best for my sister no matter what her choices have been. Thank you Lord that your love endures through every circumstance. I know I have needed your Outrageous Love to light the way through some of the hardest times of my life and to bring truth to the areas in my life that needed cleaning up. God I just pray that you will show me how you want me to Outrageously Love my sister.

Please pray for my sister and niece this week. And please pray for me as i try to do what feels so impossible at the moment. ok Lord, I know this is going to be a process. have mercy on me as you continue to burn away the parts of me that need refining.

still a fan. might love him more because of this show.

laughed out loud. loudly.

Be thou...

Hi God,

I just wanted to let you know how thankful I am to have a place to live, a job that enables me to pay rent and the rest of my bills, and friends and family that love and support me through anything that life throws my way. I am pretty darn blessed. And no matter how many little things that I can think to complain about at work or just waiting on your timing... I know that you have your hand on where I am right now. Thanks. It is easy to get distracted by what is not happening right now. Thanks Lord for all that I do have right now in my life.

Your Daughter,

Jami

Hello 29!!

Never have I been so shocked at a number and excited for a new year than right now. I am a little in denial that I am actually 29 now. It doesn't seem possible that the years have gone by that quickly... that makes me sound old. gosh. But the years really have gone by fast. Our parents weren't kidding when they said such things.

This past year has been a hard one. I made it through a time of difficult classes. I had to withdrawal from classes during winter and spring quarter to have surgery and then recover from surgery. This summer I watched God provide job after job to meet my every need. This fall I have been training at a new job... it is a job... but one that has been quite challenging in several ways.

I am so excited to have a new beginning. I was getting excited for 2010 because I like fresh starts... and then it hit me that I have a new year of my life! Woohoo! I am so excited to see what the Lord is going to teach me this year!

Goals for year 29 include:
~ visit Sonja and Cam in Australia (and as many DTS mates as I can!)
~ get my bod and GI in shape!
~ go back to school
~ go on dates
~ find a job that I enjoy (and can stand behind the company)
~ laugh as much as possible
~ get rid of more stuff
~ go on a missions trip
~ take more pictures
~ be crafty more often
~ spend less money
~ love my family more
~ share Christ with one person a month
~ take a road trip
~ smile at strangers
~ make more friends
~ go kayaking
~ visit the dentist & orthodontist
~ watch less TV
~ start journaling again
~ get involved in a church
~ do something musical
~ live more transparently
~ learn to cook
~ spend intentional time with God every day
~ go camping
~ go polar-bearing in the ocean
~ visit a spa
~ save money on my car insurance :)

I think that was 29 goals. I am sure I can come up with more than that but I am unsure if I will be able to accomplish all of these in year 29. But it is good to have goals. Something to have to focus on.

I am so thankful for another year to begin. Thank you Lord for getting me through year 28. You are so faithful. Praying that this year is full of fun and less of the hard stuff like last year. I am embracing year 29 as my last year in my 20s and hope to live it to the fullest! Its just a number... maybe it will become one of my favourite years of life thus far :) one can hope!

Hello 29!!

I hate my guts!

no seriously. my guts as in my GI tract have been the source of discomfort in my life since I was born. you might be saying... why the heck is Jami blogging about her guts?... well it all has to do with something I heard in church today. but before I get to that I have to tell you something I was talking about with my friend Danielle a few weeks ago.

so I was talking about my messed up belly and how I have been on diets where I cut all things delicious out of my life and basically lived off of fruits and vegetables, fish, and rice for several months. I am someone who loves the richness and sweetness of cheesecake. my diet that helps my tummy feel better eliminates dairy, wheat, barley, rye, soy, corn, sugar (artificial are the worst!), caffeine,things high in fat or insoluble fiber, chocolate, red meat, acidic foods, eggs, alcohol, carbonated beverages and pretty much anything else that is delicious that you can think of. Danielle and I agreed that life is pretty much not worth living when you cut out all the glorious foods that God so obviously created (or maybe man created).

So today at church our speaker was talking about living as dead people and how we need to die to ourselves. He reminded us that within the word diet - is the word die. We must die to our appetite so that we can live. Live healthier. Make choices bases on knowledge of what is good for our bodies rather than what is not.

How am I going to do this? Listening to God about what I eat is too big for Him. But I thought I would give it a try. My trying only lasted as long as it took me to get home. I sure had a lousy start. Had chili and cheese with corn chips. An old family swim meet food. Hmmm... lets see how many things were good for me in that. beans = insoluble fiber, red meat = rotting meat torturing my gut, cheese = dairy is the devil, corn chips = more insoluble fiber. Poor choice Jami. At least I drank a couple glasses of water and then took the dog on a 45 minute walk.

What is my goal and what am I going to do to achieve that goal?
Making choices like having healthy snacks prepared for when I am on the go will stop me from picking up some unhealthy choice at a fast food establishment.
My goal is to be healthy, make healthy choices, feel healthy, and encourage others to live healthy life styles. Through these healthy living choices I hope to gain some more living time in my life and lose some much loathed weight in the process. In just less than 14 months I will be turning 30. My goal is to be 75-100 pounds less by that time.

With God all things are possible. Even a fat girl dying to her appetite. My health is important to God. He spoke that loud and clear this morning. From here on out I will ask Him for help and try to listen and obey as He helps me make healthy choices.

I know that diet needs to be combined with exercise and will be working out at the YMCA (with a workout buddy or two) as well as kicking my butt into gear with some www.beachbody.com dvds (these have worked me into some amazing shape in the past and I am excited to use them again), and being outdoors (walking, biking, hiking, or anything else I can do to be active in the NW).

Some day I may not have a six pack, but I hope my stomach is flat and not round. I will always have stretch marks and scars from my operation, but under those will be a GI tract that is happy and healthy.

Lord help me turn my life around and make choices that will help this body you gave me live life to the fullest (not the fullest belly but the fullest life!)!

too much salt

I was listening to Christian radio on my drive to an interview today (ok friends who don't like KCMS please don't stop reading) and one of the announcers was talking about cooking (I think I might have gotten Ang to keep reading because I mentioned cooking)and how when you are adding salt to a recipe there is an amount that should not be exceeded, otherwise, the dish turns out not so delicious.
the announcer dude then paralleled the salt to adding Jesus to different areas of our lives. He said we can add, and add, and keep adding Jesus and there isn't a point ever where there is too much Jesus in an area of our lives. its quite the opposite. the more we add His truths and His ways to all the areas of our lives the better all the areas of our lives get!
so. I guess I just need more Jesus

I AM JOB!

Its official! My economic crisis has come to an end. God has brought me through the last 13 months and one day and today I was offered a job working in a call center for an affiliated wireless company. If you are a Verizon customer and dial 611 you may get me on the other end of the line! Awesomeness! It will be amazing to have an income again... let alone medical, dental, and vision insurance!! wow!

If you have been following along in my life you know that throughout the past year every bill has been paid by God... I know this to be true because every time something was close to due or I would almost start to worry (ok. some days there was some serious worry going on!) God would take me back to His promises to be my Provider.

55K in medical bills were covered! all of my tuition and books were covered! 13 months of car insurance, cell phone, gas, food, and a credit card (that I will be paying off and cutting up once I get my first whoppin paycheck!)covered! God is AMAZING!

I will be working in Federal Way at ACS. Training will be 7 weeks long! Please keep me in your prayers as I start this new adventure. There will be a LOT to learn! I know that God will get me through this one too. Praying also for some great friends at this job, a good relationship with my boss, and opportunities to testify the awesomeness of Jesus!

My first day in September 23rd... until then I will be dog sitting in Orting and moving my stuff into a house with some friends. God is SO GOOD!

I am truly in awe of the awesomeness of God. He has taught me so much on trust, provision, waiting, trust, provision... yeah. you get the point. He has shown me how capable He is. He is more than able!

Whats the story?

So, early in the summer I had a wee revelation. Somewhere in my little brain a light turned on and I my eyes opened a little wider. I was discovering the importance of diversity in people. I was captivated as I walked down the street and people watched at my favorite local coffee house. My thought with every person I saw being... "what is their story?"

It is so small of me to think that people are not shaped by their life circumstances and social influences. As I asked God to open my eyes and give me a heart for His children like I have not experienced before I found that I had created my own fears. In my mind differences made someone less approachable when in reality someone who is different is more likely to challenge my perceptions and cause me to think more... thus growing more.

A friend of mine recommended a book to me about this time. It was made into a movie, though I have yet to see the film. "The Soloist" was another opportunity to challenge my "what is their story?" thought. In the book a brilliant man with a severe mental illness winds up playing at Julliard and then later on the streets of the ghetto.

My mom has been labeled as bipolar for ten plus years and it has taken me that long to discover that she has a story of her own. This summers circumstances (I will share more on that some day) allowed a greater understanding of how she developed her mental illness over the course of her life. It is so sad to think that people in her life purposefully abused her and made her to feel as less of a person. I hope some day that she will know how worthy of love she truly is.

It is easy then to think of judgment for those who chose to belittle her and take away her self-worth. Unfortunately and fortunately I have no right to that judgment. Unfortunately, because there are moments when I would like to tell someone that they deserve judgment and their actions are going to take them to a fiery place... and fortunately, because my actions occasionally merit the same thoughts and I know that God's grace so undeservedly abounds new every day.

So back to judgment. Why is it that I judge people as I see them each day? As I think about how I was raised (in my family and in the church), I see that it was taught to me to befriend those who are like me in faith and to stay away from those who had differences. It was said to me that if I was friends with kids who were different I would "get sucked in" to their crowd and be ruined forever.

So who did Jesus befriend? Did He find people that were like Him? Sure He spent time with the disciples... but were they really like Him? They were fishermen, a doctor, a tax collector, and several others occupations are unknown. He spent time with murderers and thieves, prostitutes and the sick.

I find it interesting that judgment was taught to my as part of my Christian upbringing and yet it so contradicts the lifestyle of my Jesus.

It is sad to me that I have lost several years of my life to narrow-minded thinking, however, as an eternal optimist I can turn it around and say that I am grateful for the grace that God shows me. That even though I chose to judge, He does not. He has taken away judgment with the gift of the Cross. Amazing! And I have the rest of my life to change that old way of thinking.

I hope that through new eyes, eyes that are similar to the Lords, I will be able to see and hear more of the stories of the people I come in contact with.

Ever person has a unique story. I challenge you (and myself) to find out someone's story before you stereotype them.

God is bigger...

This year has been one for the books. Seriously, I could write a whole book about it if I sat down and mapped one out. So much has happened... and so much has not happened. And yet the year is not over.

So to get to my thought of God being so big.

God is bigger...

*than the boggie man (thanks to Veggietales for that one).
*than the economic crisis making it difficult to find a job.
*than my resume (which shows I was "let go" from a job a year ago).
*than I can even imagine.

One of "my girls" (aka one of my former youth kids that is now a grownup and has graduated college) and I met for coffee the other day. She was sharing about her recent adventures in YWAM. One particular story she shared from one of many speakers she heard said something that has popped back into my mind almost every day since.

The speaker was talking about how big God is. There is a passage somewhere in the bible that talks about God holding some stars in his hand. Stars are not little... though they appear to be from far away. And God would not be holding just little stars. The smallest star is ginormous in reality. And yet my God held more than just one. He is able to hold massive stars in His hands. WOW! My God is HUGE!

Sure He cares about the stars and that they brighten our night skies and delight our hearts to look and wish upon. But He cares so much more for His dear children. He can carry us all in His (perfect love) hands.

So knowing that I am in His hands makes the not knowing about tomorrow ok.

Here I sit replaying Proverbs 3:5&6 over to myself... trying to wrap my mind and heart around the words that are not foreign to me.

God is bigger. This I know.

The Proposal

It was a wonderful night. Beautiful sunset complete with a proposal. The movie. I won't spoil it for anyone. It was a chick flick and I am a lover of chick flicks so it made me laugh out loud and of course some tears happened. It was while I was driving home after dropping my mom off that some more tears came. I was thinking about having someone special in my life. As the tears welled up and before even one of them could fall I thought about how many tears I have shed in my life time. Tears of loss. Tears of joy. Tears of anger. Tears of not understanding. Tears for every emotion. Then it hit me that God knows exactly how many tears that I have shed. He knows every thought and emotion that went along with each tear. He knows me better than I know myself. Truly amazing. I am so thankful for my Heavenly Father. The creator of the universe is amazing. And it blows my mind regularly that He loves me more than I can even understand.
Thank you Lord for caring so deeply and loving like no one else can - each and every one of your children!

Who is my provider?

I don't have the security of parents to come to my rescue when I need help financially. Though they would like to help me (that hasn't always been the case for my dad but God has done some awesome work in his life) they just don't have the means to do it.

After having surgery nine weeks ago... it has been different than I anticipated. Medications made it impossible for me to make it through the quarter of pre-reqs for nursing. I was so frustrated with myself and felt like I had failed God. Afterall He had done such a miracle in getting me surgery so quickly and with a quicker estimated recovery time. All I had to do was get back in the game and get my school on. After not being able to focus and study and doing horribly in classes I realized that it was not just me but my body was still recovering. So I surrendered to the rest my body so needed.

A few long weeks later I start feeling a bit semi normal and started looking for jobs. I don't know how many I have applied for, submitted resumes for, or interviewed for so far. It has been a LOT!

I was just thinking about how I haven't had a job since August and have been living off of my student loans. Nine weeks after surgery I have had two garage sales, five house/animal sitting jobs, one recurring babysitting job, and one cleaning job. I did not seek out any of these jobs. These people contacted me. Did they know I had a need. Not all of them. Some of these jobs were set in my calender a couple months ago... most were scheduled a day or two in advance.

I am in awe looking at these provisions right now. Though there are unanticipated medical bills in my inbox... I do not doubt my Jehovah Jirah's ability to meet my needs. As I was sitting outside in the sunshine at one of my garage sales yesterday a tiny hummingbird flew within a few feet of me. It stopped to suckle on a nearby plant. At that moment I heard God whisper to me. See Jami... I take care of these precious birds and you are even more precious to me. Peace reigns in my heart because I know that even though the bills are here I know that God is going to provide for my every need.

Another way God has provided... He brought my best friend home for five weeks. She is here without her husband (miss you Camalama! but I am so excited to be spending time with your wifey!) so I get to see her more than usual. God is so good. He pours out blessings on His kids!

I know that God must be providing in awesome ways for others. It is who He is. He is Jahovah Jirah our Provider. That is His name! If you are facing a time of hardship I hope you will remember that God is the One who can meet your every need. Not your every want... but your needs. He knows our every need and remember he takes care of the birds of the air and the flowers of the fields as well and we are so much more precious to Him than those.

Matthew 6:25-33
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

I hope you will be encouraged and reminded of the awesomeness of our Heavenly Father. He is SO GOOD! Blessings to you and your loved ones. May the Lord meet your every need in His perfect timing!

Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'

This Mother's Day weekend I got in a car with my mom and drove the five hours from Seattle to Spokane so my mom could see her grandbabies for the weekend. I was apprehensive for several reasons. But God has been showing me more and more that I need to love more selflessly... especially with my family. So I was pleasantly surprised when this weekend was filled with so many wonderful moments.

Here are a few of my favourites...

After dinner on Friday night we walked to the park down the street from my sisters new place. My nieces bring out a silly side of me. I soon found myself running through the field being chased and chasing my little nieces around. The hillside was calling me to come and play so I gave in and found my inner kid again. As I rolled down the hillside it was impossible to stop laughing. Oh the sweet simple joy of rolling down a hill. I can't believe that it has been more than a decade since I had that sweet joy! I even got my mom to roll down the hill! It was so wonderful I had to repeat it again and again until one of the little ones declared she had to go potty and we had to leave the park. Goal. Must roll down hills at least once a year... preferably once a month.

On Saturday night my sis decided it was movie night and picked out Mamma Mia (I didn't think it was appropriate for kids but her mind would not be changed). I loved this movie when I saw it in theaters and was so excited to have a repeat experience. It was better than before. The kids only stayed up for the first 30-45 minutes of it. As the music came on it was impossible to stay in our seats. I found all the girls spoons, whisks, and ladles to be their microphones for the evening. We sang and danced our hearts out. Mamma Mia will forever be a super special memory.

Sunday morning I was awoken to the sweet sounds of a three year old giggling with her grandmother. She woke up bright eyed and full of love and had to go tell her grandma first thing that she loved her. She calls my mom Grandma Sunshine because while my sis had left her family two years ago my mom stayed with the girls for six months to help out. My mom would sing "You are my Sunshine" to Mea every day multiple times a day. Mea now sings the whole song to my mom and has such sweet pure love for her. I was sleeping downstairs and heard Mea say again and again... I love you Gramma. It was in between her giggles that she interjected her love for her grandma. I wish every morning started with such love and laughter. So beautiful.

So I am so glad I went to Spokane with my mom for the weekend. It was so special. We had some great conversations in the car and so many sweet moments with my adorable nieces. What a glorious Mothers Day weekend indeed. I hope everyone else was able to have some sweet moments too.

love!

If you haven't gathered this already from my past posts... I love music!
It is something amazing to get a revelation about more of who God is through how He has revealed Himself to a person and then developed a song in their heart which then gets shared with the world.
Having gone through much time of waiting and trusting and trying to understand the whys of life... it is often through quiet times of hearing God through music that my spirit finds peace and rest and comfort from the truths that God speaks through musicians. Music speaks loudly to my soul. It is those moments where I get lost in the words and presence of God that I get found. I get the truth. Then I have to listen to it a couple more times til it restores me as I am filled up with words from my Father.
I am so thankful that God gave us music! He has blessed us with some amazing musicians that are anointed and help to usher us into His presence. Wow. What an extraordinary gift!
Some of my newest favorites include:
Kari Jobe, Tenth Avenue North, Starfield, Vicky Beeching, Lindsey Kane, and JJ Heller to name a few. Check em out if you want. I don't think you will be disappointed.
Blessings to you dear friends!

I love this song! Its a love song from our Maker. So precious. Thank you Jesus for your love that is unlike any love we have or ever will experience! Such an amazing and beautiful love.

My Beloved - Kari Jobe

beyond what I imagined

This year has been filled with so many unpredictable moments. So many times I questioned God and what He was trying to teach me. I told Him what I had already learned. I told Him I didn't need another lesson in _______. His plan was different than what I could understand on a day by day basis. It has taken me the better part of four months to understand part of the plan He had in letting certain events in my life unfold the way they did. Through it all... I have seen God's sovereignty, I have felt His peace and protection, I have grown to know more of who He is. I would not ask for anyone to have to go through difficult circumstances in their life. The only good thing about trials is all the growth and miracles that God can show through the unpleasant and unwanted circumstances. Though my story is different than your story... we all have experienced a tough circumstance or will experience one at one point or another in our lives. The following song and story touched my heart and reminded me that though we may not feel like worshiping in the midst of our circumstances... "All of my life. In every season. You are still God. I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship."
I pray that your circumstances will not disable your ability to worship. God will meet you. Even if it takes you some time to feel Him near you again, He will be there and not ever leave.
Your circumstance does not change that God is still God and what He has called you to do in your life.
I hope you are blessed by this song and the story shared by one of the musicians.



The Desert Song- Hillsong


This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides


And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

Chorus:
And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here


And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand


All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship


This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be empited again
The seed I've recieved I will sow